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Lucifel's Ideal World, v.2
—The world is ugly, he once declared.
Chaos is inevitable in this world. Pure good can’t be achieved, and pure evil breaks down. And these two extremes are always incompatible with each other. There is still some evil in a good world. That is how the world is, and it is what continues to create ugly things. Evil sneers at good, and good rages over evil. But, in a world where good and evil oppose each other, there is a group that is far more numerous that always appears.
That is ‘grey’. Neither good nor evil. A group that drifts through life haphazardly and merely exists. They don’t believe in goodness and are simply proud that they aren’t evil. Even though they affirm evil acts, they deny evil intentions. They happily say that ‘I am not evil, I am a good person’ and pardon all forms of cruelty.
They kill people while sneering. They kill people out of contempt. They kill people as part of a game. They use the excuse that they can’t restrain their desires—That’s how humans are. That’s how the world is.
Yes—this world is extremely ugly. Neither dyed by good nor fallen into evil. Unable to decide on a color, the wills of people continue to waver. As long as such evil intentions and such foul-smelling corpses aren’t destroyed.
The world will surely continue to rot eternally.
While wrapped within a curse-like fog in darkness frozen to its core.
He thus concluded.
Powers are off.
Corruptions are off.
Carry-on Weapons are not available.
Other carry-on items are available.
Re: 『Heaven's Grass』
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No one's charging money for bikes or nothing, that ain't normal.
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If that is not normal to you, then perhaps your world is at fault.
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...you know something's out there bleaching your flowers, yeah?
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They're your flowers, yeah? Higanbanas?
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This is a graveyard, Hurricane-san.
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[ or feel it, perhaps—
after all, the mud is wet, and the stench of metal is strong. ]
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. . .
These are the people who died for me.
I'm. . .
[ slower, softer, ]
I'm in the process of letting them go.
Re: 『Heaven's Grass』
It's like... pretty and everything? And you got a bunch of nice roses now. But it kinda don't count, unless you do it in the real world.
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You can practice back home, too, y'know. And you don't gotta wait on solving other stuff to do it.
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It's fine if you don't understand.
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Forgiving yourself's great and all, but you don't gotta have missing cars and kids not playing on bikes and like eighty-seven different prereqs before you get started.
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When you die—when you finally die, not this desecration of life by the Producers—wouldn't you want your death to mean something in the end?
Wouldn't you want to . . . have accomplished something?
Impacted something?
Made a difference? Somewhere, in some way?
Re: 『Heaven's Grass』
Every time I try and do something worth something, it just gets twisted around.
But little stuff - stuff you can work on with just you? That's something you can do whenever. It's like - training, you know? Someone told me that, once. And it's true. Even if you don't got all the other stuff in place - even if you keep messing everything else up - you can still change some stuff, a little at a time, about you.
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. . . If I start to let them go, with no progress made—then they will have died for nothing.
[ softly, softly ]
Thirty-seven thousand people will have died for nothing—under my banner, while believing in me, they will have perished, and I will have nothing to show for it.
Until I have attained something—something meaningful—I won't let go of a single soul.
Re: 『Heaven's Grass』
But it ain't real. Whatever you do here, it's not gonna help you fix nothing. Even if you can't start working your way through stuff, back home - grow your white flowers, or whatever - at least there, you can start doing stuff that counts.
Maybe it ain't all at once. Maybe it ain't a city without the game tower, and happy kids, and - and card games instead of fighting. But you can do little stuff. And however little that little stuff is, it's better than even the big stuff here. Cause it's real.
Re: 『Heaven's Grass』
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You say you're working on forgiving yourself, but if to do that you gotta have all this other stuff in place, that's just as fake as everything else here.
If you're awake, even if you ain't replanting all those red flowers right away, at least you're like... starting off down the road to doing it later. And maybe it's only a couple steps, but a couple steps are better than standing still.
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I do agree with you. This world isn't real, so ultimately, there's little meaning in staying in it. I don't plan on staying here forever, either.
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