Capitalism, Ho!: avante en garde

[idolpro]

[ Everything fades to black...and you awaken in a run-down one-room shack, with the distinct feeling that the people around you are your family, if you didn't already have such a bond with them.

You're wearing raggedy versions of your clothes, and a newspaper informs you that you are currently in %COUNTRYNAME%, in the year %CONTEMPORARY%. The newspaper is otherwise actually fairly unhelpful, aside from something detailing a recent high-profile murder having been solved: despite confusion on the part of the authorities conducting the initial investigation, it turns out the victim had been tragically murdered via gun in the knife.

What do you do? ]

Comments

YEAR 1

[idolpro]

SET YOUR BUDGET.

[idolpro]

RECOMMENDED NECESSITIES:

Housing - 1000
Food - 900
Medicine - 200
Clothing - 300

LUXURIES: NO RECOMMENDATIONS

Alcohol (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Other Unspecified Drugs (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
FANCY Clothes (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Books (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
One Eighth Of An Automobile (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Nice Furniture (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -

CURRENT JOB - COAL MINER. YEARLY INCOME - 1800 MONIES.

Will you pay taxes this year?

BUDGET TURN-IN

[idolpro]

EVENT 1

[idolpro]

Your home has an infestation of rats. What do you do?

EVENT 2

[idolpro]

While working on the mineral line, you notice a problem with a conveyer belt. You can either attempt to fix it, or leave it for the next shift.

EVENT TURN IN

[idolpro]

[unbr8kable]

[looking at all this with dismay]

Gun in the knife, my ass...

YEAR 2

[idolpro]

SET YOUR BUDGET.

[idolpro]

RECOMMENDED NECESSITIES:

Housing - 1000
Food - 900
Medicine - 200
Clothing - 300

LUXURIES: NO RECOMMENDATIONS

Alcohol (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Other Unspecified Drugs (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
FANCY Clothes (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Books (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
One Eighth Of An Automobile (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Nice Furniture (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -

CURRENT JOB - COAL MINER. YEARLY INCOME - 1800 MONIES.

Will you pay taxes this year?

NITROGLYCERIN is missing a HAND.

BUDGET TURN-IN

[idolpro]

EVENT 1

[idolpro]

A tax collector shows up at your door. You are under arrest. What do you do?

EVENT 2

[idolpro]

Your cat is suffering from tapeworm! Do you pay money to have it treated?

EVENT 3

[idolpro]

Your bravery has caught the notice of your employers! You have been offered a position as MINE SECURITY. Do you accept?

EVENT TURN IN

[idolpro]

[unbr8kable]

Uh, shit, dude. I'll stick my hand in stuff from now on, okay?

YEAR 3

[idolpro]

SET YOUR BUDGET.

[idolpro]

RECOMMENDED NECESSITIES:

Housing - 1000
Food - 900
Medicine - 200
Clothing - 300

LUXURIES: NO RECOMMENDATIONS

Alcohol (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Other Unspecified Drugs (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) - 1 UNIT
FANCY Clothes (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Books (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
One Eighth Of An Automobile (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Nice Furniture (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -

CURRENT JOB - CULT LEADER. 2500 MONIES.

NEW CRIME ABILITY: PACT: You enter a pact with the unknown, severing the hands of ONE UNIT of your choice. Their blood sates the spirits you worship.

This gets you 1000 MONIES.


Religions are tax exempt!

HAPPINESS: 20

NITROGLYCERIN has a LOW TECH PROSTHETIC HAND.

BUDGET TURN-IN

[idolpro]

EVENT 1

[idolpro]

Actually...you're doing pretty alright? Well, there is the matter of the INQUISITION now at your door. What, this country doesn't have one?

It's a citizen's inquisition. With torches and pitchforks. They saw you dancing with the devil, Avante Proctor!!!

What do you do?

EVENT TURN IN

[idolpro]

[unbr8kable]

...How 'bout that.

Year 4

[idolpro]

SET YOUR BUDGET.

[idolpro]

RECOMMENDED NECESSITIES:

Housing - 1000
Food - 900
Medicine - 200
Clothing - 300

LUXURIES: NO RECOMMENDATIONS

Alcohol (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Other Unspecified Drugs (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) - 2 UNITS
FANCY Clothes (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
Books (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) -
One Eighth Of An Automobile (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) - 8 UNITS
Nice Furniture (costs 100 per unit, adds 20 happiness per year) - 1 UNIT

CURRENT JOB - CULT LEADER +2. 3000 MONIES.

NEW CRIME ABILITY: PACT: You enter a pact with the unknown, severing the hands of ONE UNIT of your choice. Their blood sates the spirits you worship.

This gets you 1000 MONIES.


Religions are tax exempt!

HAPPINESS: 240

NITROGLYCERIN has a LOW TECH PROSTHETIC HAND.

BUDGET TURN-IN

[idolpro]

THE END.

[idolpro]

You survive, on a faraway island in peace and luxury! Well, you started a cult and these ghosts keep haunting you but they're just kinda dopey annoying knightly friends. It's like, whatever.

Just don't think about the pile of hands you had to climb to get here. The horrible, gruesome pile of hands. It's fine. It's all fine.

The cult...uh, the cult kind of goes out of control. They...they might actually be, um...

This might be a world conquest scenario?

Well, that's a story for another time!

Proceed to ENDGAME.