Capitalism, Ho!: Heart Soldier Senshi

[idolpro]

[ Everything fades to black...and you awaken in a run-down one-room shack, with the distinct feeling that the people around you are your family, if you didn't already have such a bond with them.

You're wearing raggedy versions of your clothes, and a newspaper informs you that you are currently in %COUNTRYNAME%, in the year %CONTEMPORARY%. The newspaper is otherwise actually fairly unhelpful, aside from something detailing a recent high-profile murder having been solved: despite confusion on the part of the authorities conducting the initial investigation, it turns out the victim had been tragically murdered via gun in the knife.

What do you do? ]

Comments

Re: EVENT 2

[crossmyheartandhope]

How many rats you think we got? Might need a whole lotta names. We better start brainstorming.

Re: EVENT 2

[420blazeit]

Rat 1. Rat 2.

I'm kidding. [ chuckles. ]

But we're going to do nothing with these guys? Is our answer tame the wild cuties?

Re: EVENT 2

[crossmyheartandhope]

Heck yeah, we're gonna tame em. If we're for real paying taxes, I mean about having em go steal the taxes back, too.

And if the mining life doesn't pan out, we totally got the makings of a rat circus. Who wouldn't come pay to see rats do badass stunts on the flying trapeze and stuff?

Re: EVENT 2

[420blazeit]

We could also probably get the rats to help us mine. I mean, they're good at getting into small spots and all that. I think we're actually doing pretty well for ourselves. Ok, [ bangs hand on... a table that's probably not there. ] Keeping the rats!

Re: EVENT 2

[crossmyheartandhope]

You think they could use little pickaxes?

Re: EVENT 2

[420blazeit]

...aw, that sounds so cute! I bet we could steal them some gear from the job site. I doubt our coworkers are as good at, uh, mining as us. Employees of the mine, right here! [ grabs his wrist and lifts it over their heads! ]

Re: EVENT 2

[crossmyheartandhope]

We're totally badass at mining.

Re: EVENT 2

[420blazeit]

Maybe we'll even get promoted.

Re: EVENT 2

[crossmyheartandhope]

Right? Who else could bring in a whole tiny workforce?

Re: EVENT 2

[420blazeit]

Promoted. Time and a half. Extra holidays. We're pretty much the bosses now. [ d.va, keep dreaming. ]

Re: EVENT 2

[crossmyheartandhope]

We take over the coal mine and give everyone raises. Then we shut the mine down, cause rat circus is way better anyway. Everyone in the mine can come hang out with us at the circus.

Re: EVENT 2

[420blazeit]

If we take over the coal mine, then we could probably take over the world. We should definitely make sure to reinforce our rat army and then we could open circuses all over.

Re: EVENT 2

[crossmyheartandhope]

See, now we're talking. All rat circuses, all the time. Then I guess we can branch out into other stuff, like rat food?

We got built in taste-testers.