idolpro | ALCHEME

ALCHEME

[you find yourself in this derelict village, with not a soul to be seen—but before you is this station wagon:

for all intents and purposes, this baby is a simple "honk, steer, pedal to go, brakes to stop" vehicle that anyone with opposable thumbs can drive. despite its age, it does have a handy GPS system that displays paths you can take, but fails to identify anything like landmarks or other worldly features. last but not least: its paint job is done in your unit's color!

The following can be found in the trunk/dashboard:
• Icepicks
• These 5 Bone Saws
• A surgical set
• A single miniature of 99 Bananas
• one large first aid kit containing nothing but bandages and bandaids]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[the GPS can talk, and it sounds a lot like God's voice]

Do please choose between the following blessed paths!

[the GPS screen then shows four paths fanned out in different directions, and reads aloud the vague directions in, once again, God's glorious voice]

1) LEFTMOST PATH

2) LEFT PATH

3) RIGHT PATH

4) RIGHTMOST PATH

[the GPS does not give you any hint as to which goes where. just like God herself, it's entirely unhelpful.]

Oh, this looks fun.

This bitch this absolute biittccchhhh how dare sheeeee....

Literally how dare!

CAN SHE NOT.

She's targeting one of our BABIES.

Look at this poor miserable toddler of ours!

(no subject)

featherbeaned - 2021-12-19 19:47 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

liarliarliar - 2021-12-19 20:12 (UTC) - Expand

[FROZEN—not literally tho]

Ughhhhhhh...

My hair's warm if you need to burrow.

[ is she joking, or, ]

Can't believe that disgusting woman laser targeted one of our babies like this.

[...going to just gently shove him into the back of the car]

Cling for warmth back there to Tea and her hair.